The Wisdom Blog

“Doing nothing is better than being busy doing nothing.” –Lao Tzu

Mr. Proskey was a farmer-and he was my neighbor some years back when I lived in Iowa. I met him in a panic when I banged on his front door to tell him his cows were ambling down the middle of a two lane road. I recently moved to this small farming town from the big cities of Chicago and Milwaukee where livestock lived in zoos; to my mind, cows in the street was asking for Big Trouble. Recklessly, I abandoned my car in the middle of the lane with the hazard lights flashing and made a wild eyed dash up the long driveway to Mr. Proskey’s house to give him the urgent news. When he opened the door I yelled the information to him and began to run back to the road, certain that Mr. P would be right on my heels. Instead, he held his ground in the doorway, hands on hips and grinning widely. He said to me, “Well aren’t you spunky!” When, what seemed like ages later, we finally got down to the road, the cows were gathered around my car, licking the paint off of it. I am not joking about this.

In any given moment, especially when all hell breaks loose, the only thing you can do may also be the wisest thing to do. This often means that doing nothing, at least for a little while, is often the answer. Some people might think that “doing nothing” is inappropriately passive and well, wimpy. This is because we are wired to react and act out our habits and emotional patterns that may or may not be useful but that fit us like a weary but oh so comfortable pair of shoes. Resisting the urge to react is what makes “doing nothing” so challenging for most of us.

The wise people I’ve talked with tend to look at each fresh crisis with interest as opposed to judgment. They are less likely to see trouble as catastrophes and are more likely to say things like “well isn’t that interesting” or “aren’t you spunky.” Perhaps they would go so far as to allow they are in a “fine kettle of fish.” But they often do nothing, at least for a little while. When they do take action, it usually results in a good outcome with concern for others as well as for themselves.

What would it feel like for you to actually have the strength to do nothing when what you really want to do is react? What strategies could you employ to get better at this? Here are some wise ways to give this a try (notice that “doing nothing” is actually quite active):

1. Take a couple of breaths. Look at the bigger picture in addition to the scene right in front of you. Actually say out loud: “Well isn’t that interesting.”

2. Count to 10, which will give you a chance to reroute your emotional response back to the thinking part of your brain where a dose of rational thinking can be injected into the mix.

3. Ask yourself if your typical reaction will be good for you and for others in the long run. If it isn’t, count to 10 and then think of another option.

4. Consider what would be the exact opposite of your usual reaction and try that first. See what happens.

5. Choose to be a leader in the situation. In other words, step up and resonate a demeanor that allows everyone else to be their best in the situation.

Give this a try and share your story! I love learning how wisdom works in your life.

Best Always,
Elle
Founder of Wisdom Out

“Don’t underestimate the value of doing nothing, of just going along listening to all the things you can’t hear, and not bothering.” –Winnie the Pooh